Grief and loss
Grief and loss are universal human experiences. While often associated with death, grief and loss can arise from many life events. Loss can be something tangible, like the death of a loved one or patient, but can also be less visible such as the loss of identity or purpose. The more significant the loss is to you, the more intense your grief is likely to be.
Understanding grief
Grief is the internal response to loss. It can include a range of emotional reactions including sadness, anger, confusion and even relief. While there are recognised stages of grief, there is no right or wrong way to grieve - everyone experiences it differently.
There are many different types of grief, from bereavement to prolonged. For explanations go to Griefline: different types of grief. Different interventions are helpful to address the different types of loss.
Recognising the signs that you are grieving
Grief can show up as sadness, numbness, irritability, exhaustion, distraction or even feeling detached from others. You might notice changes in your sleep, appetite, concentration or energy levels. Maintaining your normal work or personal life schedule while grieving a loss can be difficult.
If something feels "off" after a loss or change, whether it’s a death, a job change, or the end of something meaningful, it might be grief. Naming it is a powerful first step toward healing.
The service I’d dedicated 15 years to closed unexpectedly. I was just about to be promoted. We all had to start looking for jobs. Trying to apply for roles while grieving the loss of my daily routine and the work I loved felt almost impossible. I was overwhelmed, sad and nowhere near the version of myself I thought I should be for a job interview.Mary, RN
Responding to patient death
A patient’s death can affect us in many ways. Whether it’s expected or sudden, peaceful or traumatic, these experiences can leave a lasting impact. It might be your first time, or one of many. You may have just met the person or cared for them over a long period. However, it happens, it’s normal to have a range of emotional reactions.
It can help to talk to someone you trust, or to us, and to honour your patient in a way that feels authentic to you. Acknowledge how you’re feeling and be extra kind to yourself during this time. You are allowed to grieve the loss of your patients.
Coping with grief and loss – strategies
Communicating to others about what you are experiencing can help. Be honest with family and friends about how you are feeling and be open to accepting their help.
While some people find being at work beneficial, others may need to take some time off to process what’s going on.
Strategies you could try to include:
- acknowledging how you are feeling and the impact - whatever comes up
- talking to someone you trust (we are here if you need us)
- honouring the person in a way that feels authentic to you
- being extra kind to yourself – grief can be exhausting
- maintaining your routine – small things such as your bed and getting dressed.
It’s important to acknowledge how you’re feeling and remember you are not alone.
Asking for support
Talking things through with someone can be helpful, especially if you’re feeling overwhelmed, unsure, or just a bit ‘off’. That’s what we’re here for.
We offer a safe, confidential space to reflect, process and take care of your own wellbeing.
We’re here for you if you want to talk. Call us on 1800 010 060 and speak with an experienced nurse or midwife about what you’re navigating. They can help you work out a plan towards healing and recovery.
When you’re not ok
Seek help. Speak to a nurse or midwife who understands.
References
- Nurses' Experiences of Grief Following Patient Death: A Qualitative Approach, by I. Khalaf, 2017. Journal of Holistic Nurses
- Grief, Australian Psychology Society